When I started taking Tamoxifen as a necessary post-cancer treatment, my doctor told me I needed to stop taking Zoloft as it would interfere. I had been feeling pretty good, so I didn't mind. Within a month however, I was sinking into depression.
The rational side of brain was perfectly happy. I knew that I had a loving family, a comfortable home, a job that I loved, and wonderful coworkers. Yet all I wanted to do was crawl up in a ball on the couch and sleep. I felt I was always on the verge of breaking into tears. This was not something I was going to talk myself out of. No amount of kind words or reminders of caring were going to make a difference. I rarely smiled and never laughed. I was just trying to hold it all together. As awful as I felt, there were no thoughts of "If only..." or "I want...." Mostly I was just thinking, "It doesn't matter." Most of all I didn't want to have to take an anti-depressant. I didn't want to be dependent.
After talking to my pastor and my doctor, I got a prescription for something that would not interfere with my meds. Within hours I was no longer on the verge of tears. Within a few days, my husband noticed the difference in posture and demeanor.
Depression is a medical problem. Don't let our culture's attitude toward mental health keep you from getting the help you need. If you are depressed, see your doctor. If psychotherapy or adjusting your diet will help, great! Do that! Bust just as a diabetic needs insulin, some people need medication to correct a problem with the brain's chemistry. If you need meds, take them. If they aren't helping, talk to your doctor about getting them adjusted.
It sucks to need medication. But it doesn't make you weak and it doesn't make you crazy. It makes you grown-up enough to do what it takes to be there for your loved ones.
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